First Impressions

I put my foot in my mouth. A lot. I say a ton of stupid shit that I wish I could take back. But I can’t. That’s just a fact of life.

However, I always say what I am feeling. If I’m irritated or pissed off, even if I don’t actually vocalize it, my face hides nothing.  My mom always said I was like a cartoon in that I show every emotion on my face. (And, I make stupid, silly faces all the time.)

With people knowing that I say what I think (I seriously have no brain-mouth filter), I don’t understand how people can be so offended by me being hurt by them.

If I vent that someone is acting like a bitch to me…and everyone around me can see and hear that I’m telling the truth…should that person be upset? I’ve been picked on and teased since I was little, and I find that every time I bring it up, I get attacked.

No, I can’t let every little thing that happened to me roll off my back.

I DO have emotions, even though I try my damnedest to keep them to myself.

I WILL NOT forget the rumors that were started about me in high school, that I think affected how everyone saw me until I graduated.

First impressions are, sadly, the things that will stick with people forever. And, thanks to some, I will probably be remembered for something that was not true. I wasn’t even involved.

But when people who are supposedly close to you are the ones starting the nasty things being spread throughout the already harsh and gossipy high school community, it’s hard to forget, let alone forgive.  You may have thought it was funny, but I will hurt from that until the day I can’t remember it anymore.

So don’t get offended when I complain that you’re a bitch or an asshole. Because you have those qualities.

And if you have issues with something I said or did, come to me first. I’m a strong person. I can deal with whatever you have to say. You don’t have to involve a middle man. Or my mother.

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